After a crazy Christmas of baby bronchitis, challenges from my son about the legitimacy of Father Christmas and epic tiredness I am relieved to start the New Year. I get my baby into a sort of routine, send my son back to school, get the husband out of the house and settle down to do some work. Then bang! it hits me. I have so much to do! I have put off mountains of tasks until ‘after Christmas’ and for when my little one is 3 months old. Both have now occurred. I feel an almost intolerable pressure. It balloons up inside my brain and I can’t see anything else except this endless list of tasks that seems to be moving constantly so I can’t focus. Shit.
I am old enough and wise enough now to know that pressure doesn’t help me. It makes me confused and very obsessive. I know that unless I calm down I will get nothing done (unless you count obsessively checking my emails or my phone for voicemails that don’t appear, which really I can’t) I work best when I feel calm and a little in control. So I decide to go to Richmond Park for a walk. It sort of works; the beautiful trees, the lovely views across London, the cute frolicking deer… it helps me get enough perspective that by the time I get home I can sit and write a plan that actually looks reasonable and doable. I pleased and able to start being nice to my family again.